HOLY FAMILY HOMILY – YEAR C 2024
Lk 2.41-52 Ecc 3.2-6,12-14 Col 3.12-21
Now it’s time for the post-Christmas lull, after the big buildup and preparations, along with the end of year school events and Christmas gatherings in the workplace and elsewhere. It’s a bit of an anti-climax, having the feast of Holy Family straight after the big event, but here we are again, hopefully happy as can be, most of us having gathered as families over the Christmas period.
The portrayals of Jesus, Mary and Joseph, in statues and in art, and in holy books, suggest an ideal, which obviously no other family could emulate, as there’s no perfect child, and the relationship of Mary and Joseph wasn’t exactly the norm. So let’s accept that theirs was a unique situation not to be imitated literally.
The closest we get to contention between Jesus and his parents is seen in today’s gospel (the Fifth Joyful Mystery of the Rosary), where Jesus, at the age of 12, remains behind in the Temple, unknown to them. While he defends his reasons for staying, as he says it was his Father’s will that he engage with the rabbis, and learn from them, as a priority, he then submits to his parents’ authority and returns home with them, until his time comes for public ministry. Luke’s story could be seen as a literary construct to emphasise that Jesus’ sense of mission evolved as he was growing up in his own family environment. The apocryphal Gospel of Thomas even has the child Jesus turning clay pigeons into live birds, but that can be taken as fanciful imagination!
No doubt, Christmas can highlight some of the challenges families face, with different personalities and perspectives. I can just look at my own, where there is all sorts of political and medical diversity, given that Paul my next brother is retired from his business, Maree my sister is a trained nurse who does massage and acupuncture, her husband David a chiropractor, Peter my brother is an orthopaedic surgeon, and youngest sister Barbara a rehab specialist! So you can get any medical opinion you want!
For me, the highlight this Christmas, however, was the welcoming the next generation, with 2 new members into our family, with the arrivals of Charlotte (9 months old) and Charlie (only 3 days old at Christmas!). There’s no doubt that new life brings joy and hope, as we gathered together to celebrate. At the same time, there’s the concern that their future will be stable and happy, as they grow up to face the challenges and opportunities life has to offer.
Now, yesterday I checked the year’s statistics and discovered I’d done 72 Baptisms and 55 funerals, with only 3 weddings, but that’s not to say they’re not getting married out there, rather that they’re choosing their own way of doing it, in terms of location and ceremony.
At Baptisms, we ask (require!) that parents write and present a statement about why they seek Baptism for their children, and why they chose particular godparents. It is quite moving to hear their generally well thought out reflections, commitment to love and care, and expressions of faith in Jesus and his message. We mightn’t see them all at Mass the next week, but I do believe their intentions are sincere, in wanting the best for their children, and sharing their faith with them, leading by example.
The second reading we have today is one I use regularly at Baptisms, as it is Paul, in some ways at his best, on family life, but also limited by the worldview in which he writes. I always try to get a female to read it, and some hesitate at the point where he tells wives to obey their husbands! I recall one reader then adding ‘and husbands, obey your wives’! We have to remember that Paul was a man of his time, unmarried, perhaps fearful of women, and in a society where men had the upper hand, despite the fact I’d suspect the women ruled the roost at home often enough!
And don’t we see Jesus as counter-cultural for a man of his day, when he constantly reaches out to those in trouble and on the fringes of society, particularly women in trouble, and those who were disliked or shunned, because of their occupations or afflictions? Women appear here and there in the Gospels, as members of his itinerant group, helping provide necessities of life along the way. Jesus plays no favourites, although he does have an inner circle of apostles, with Peter, James and John at the centre.
What is more, the reality is that any healthy relationship is a partnership of equals, where respect and complementarity come naturally when worked on, with an acceptance of differences and a mature understanding of the need to compromise where there are differing perspectives.
Marriage itself is defined in Canon Law as a partnership of love and life, far more than a legal contract. That’s one reason why I’ve happily annulled thousands of marriages over the last nearly 40 years, where this element has been sadly lacking. No-one is bound to the impossible or the unbearable, and there’s nothing sacred about an abusive or dysfunctional relationship. Life is too short, anyway!
Then Paul moves to telling children to obey their parents, to which we might say ‘fair enough’, but I also qualify that by saying children have a right to ask questions and for parents to give reasons, as that’s part of growing up, living and learning about love and life. What is more, he does conclude with the direction to parents to not be too hard on their children, and not drive them to resentment.
A word has also to be said about the age old issue of old age, as raised in the wisdom of Ecclesiastes, where there is a clear exhortation about care and respect for the elderly.
And, finally, if we’re to think about family values, I refer once more to The Addams Family and The Munsters, where they might have been different, but there was respect for the wisdom of the oldies and their funny ways, an acceptance of diversity, and a friendly and warm welcome to anyone with whom they were involved, especially those on the outer. There is something to be learned from the dark humour those black and white series offered.
At the heart of family life are love, acceptance, respect, personal responsibility, and forgiveness where things go wrong, as they often enough do! So we celebrate Holy Family with our feet on the ground, and facing the challenges of our own family lives and relationships.
john hannon 29th December 2024